Tuesday, December 15, 2009

What happens when you decide to stay home and drink...

This summer was a pretty fantastic one.  Full of wonderful friends, beach days, bbq's, and of course LOT'S of ridiculousness.  This one story in particular had to be pieced together by everyone involved over the next few days... this was what we came up with.

One night this summer myself, Amanda and Ruby decided to stay in as opposed to going out to a bar.  After a lovely dinner we began doing some "light" drinking on the front porch.  The boys who live above me saw this and joined in.  What started a few beers and some nice conversation quickly turned into shot taking and story telling hour.  Let me again clarify that this was supposed to be a low-key night.

It's now about midnight and we realized we haven't seen Ruby for a little while.  We discover her praying to the porcelin gods and making it quite clear she is DONE for the night.  So even though Ruby did not make it past midnight, this speed bump did not slow down Amanda or myself.

Now the boys we have been drinking with for a the better portion of the night invite us to a party they are going to.  Here's where things begin to get hazy and multiple perspectives had to be brought together to finish the story off.

We went to a house party in the area where Amanda and I were playing beer pong.  And by playing beer pong I mean hugging/stumbling so much that we fell and completely took our the table.  We left shortly after that.  I don't think we left a great impression on our hosts.

Then we went to the Linden Suprette (a ghetto Store-24 by my apartment).  In addition to buying snacks we begged the owner to give us porn.  But not just any porn, tranny porn.  We were so amused at the idea of tranny porn that we wanted the magazine, however we did not want to buy it.  Surprisingly he did not give in to us.  I guess we weren't meant to see it, huh?  (In retrospect I'm really glad he didn't give it to us because I'm not sure how I would have reacted the next day, also I think it would have been burnt into my brain forever.)

At home Amanda decided to get to know our one neighbor a bit better and she disappeared.  In addition to her disappearance we discovered one of our upstairs neighbors passed out on the couch on the front porch.  This couch we lovingly refer to as the "aids couch" because we think homeless people sometimes sleep on it and it gets peed on occasionally.  So being nice girls, we try and wake him up because his bed is LITERALLY upstairs!  We then find out this isn't an unusual occurrence for him, so we let him sleep.

The next morning when we are grilling Amanda on what happened the night before we discover her phone is missing.  We decided it's upstairs some where, but they can't find it either.  Sadly she decides it's lost forever, a small token to pay to the party gods if I may quote "Clueless" (and when is it ever not appropriate to quote Clueless??).

A few weeks ago we were moving furniture and we found her phone behind the DVD rack!!  How it got there, we'll never know.  But was it a wonderful, and ridiculous, night?  Absolutely!

So remember, everyone is ridiculous, including your neighbors!

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